Holdin You Down (Goin in Circles)/Changes

Why is it me and this guy always get at odds at around the same time each year. I have been searching emails, since I do not have my laptop at the moment, and from 2008 we always had an issue around this time of year. I do not get it. It seems like it would never fail. We both have grown from those cute 15 year olds- we are both 21. From past messages I found how both romanticized about having a relationship. We finally had one and it ended terribly because my high levels of stress. I admit it this time it was my fault. He always finds a way to push me away. Always. I always find a way to forgive him. Always. So tell me this.. why is it we always have a rock relationship nowadays? We are always off and on. There can be months we talk to each other and months when we don't speak a word to each other. Yet beyond all the bickering and all that nonsense we love each other. I cry every time I miss him. I guess its my way of coping from my mistake. I love him with all my heart. Yes you may say I am 21 and I am too young to know how that feels, but I think my tears are enough. I know in my heart we will make up back again, but until then I am left to sweep up the pieces...  once again